NEW ELEMENTS ON THE PERIODIC TABLE 

   Element: WOMAN 
   Symbol: Wo
   Atomic Weight: 120 (more or less)
   Physical Properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may
   freeze anytime. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if not
   used well.
   Chemical properties: Very active. Possesses strong affinity to gold,
   silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able
   to absorb great amount of exotic food. Turns slightly green when
   placed beside a better specimen. Ages rapidly.
   Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for
   disintegration of wealth. Probably the single most powerful income
   reducing agent known.
   Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.
   Element: MAN 
   Symbol: XY
   Common Name(s): Varies anywhere from John to !@#$&*!
   Atomic Weight: 180 +/-100 Physical Properties: Solid at room
   temperature, but easily gets bent out of shape. Fairly dense and
   sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging
   samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young, fresh
   samples.
   Chemical Properties: Attempts to bond with Wo any chance it can get.
   Also, tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when
   mixed with Kd (element Kid) for a prolonged period of time. Neutralize
   by saturating with alcohol.
   Usage: None really, except methane production. Good samples are able
   to produce large quantities on command.
   Caution: In the absence of Wo, this element rapidly decomposes and
   begins to smell.